Cheap Weddings - with style

Do cheap weddings require wedding planners?

2007-08-24T00:18:00.001-07:00

The short answer is no - you don't need to hire a professional planner - as long as you are willing to put in the time and effort to do your own planning. It makes no difference whether we're talking cheap weddings or lavish ones - weddings don't plan themselves. Somebody has to do it.

How do you plan your own wedding?
Lots of research, lots of checklists. You're already doing online research - keep it up. Also, get your hands on as many bridal magazines as you can. There's plenty of good info there, in among the ads. Just be aware that "cheap weddings" aren't a high priority for bridal magazines or their advertisers - don't let them convince you that you have to spend a fortune to be a happy bride.

Pros and Cons of doing it yourself:
Obviously, planning it yourself is the cheapest way to go. There's plenty of free advice out there about cheap weddings - as long as you have the time to sift through it. You might also have a recently married friend or family member who can give you advice about planning your wedding (which has its own set of pros and cons - we may get to those a little later).

The downside to DIY:

Information overload - it takes a lot more time than you think to track down all the information you need;
Questionable information - Everybody has an opinion, but how do you know whose advice to listen to? Some free information is priceless, but some is worth exactly what you paid for it;
What you don't know can cost you money - By doing it all yourself, are you missing out on a trade secret or professional connection that could save you money?

What can a professional wedding planner do for you, and what will it cost?
Wedding planners and consultants come in different flavors. Professionals may charge a set fee, or work by the hour or by the task, or for a percentage of what you spend, or for vendor commissions ("free" to you). Some wedding consultants offer full service planning - everything from setting a date to sending thank-you notes (not really an option if you're on a tight budget). Others specialize in one aspect or another - specialty venues, flower arrangements, food & drink menus, or wedding party fashions, for example. Cheap weddings and wedding consultants aren't mutually exclusive. If there's something you can't handle or don't have time for, go ahead and get a quote from a professional - it's always free to ask.

Pros and cons of hiring a professional:
Aside from the obvious - that it's the easiest way to go - there are some advantages to consider. A professional planner is likely to be aware of resources you don't know about - local venues, vendors, wedding specialists. Especially during peak times, a professional may have connections and access to services unavailable to you on your own - insider relationships with caterers, reception halls, florists, etc. Finally, a professional planner might actually save you money. A few hundred dollars worth of consulting time and advice from local wedding planner could save you thousands in the long run.

The downside to hiring a planner?

The money;
The expense;
The cost. Did I mention the money? You wouldn't be looking into cheap weddings if money was no object, would you?

A third alternative is to do it yourself with the aid of a guide or some planning software. There are a couple of things available online, or you can shop a local or online bookstore to see what's on the shelves. One wedding planning guide that I've heard very good things about was written by a young woman named Erica Yoon, who was married just last spring. She did all her own research and wedding planning, and apparently saved herself thousands of dollars in the process. She has created a book and some software based on her experience, and it's available online. You might want to check out her wedding planning guide - a relatively small investment could save you many hours of time and thousands of dollars.

Whether you intend to hire a professional, do it all yourself, or follow a planning guide, and no matter whether we're talking cheap weddings or extravagant weddings, the key to your success is planning. It's never too early to get started - what are you waiting for?

Cheap weddings - where do you scrimp?

2007-08-25T16:54:00.000-07:00

According to an industry report I subscribe to, the average cost of a wedding is nearly $27,000. It breaks down something like this:

$2300 wedding ceremony
$1800 attire
$1150 flowers
$1700 jewelry
$1100 favors & gifts
$2700 photography & video
$14,000 reception
$900 music
$800 invitations
$550 limo

Some of these numbers may seem ridiculously high - like $2300 for the ceremony, not including flowers, music, invitations, anything? Don't worry, it's an average. There are some cheap weddings in there too. Some folks get married at their local church for $100; others rent symphony hall for the day. We'll be getting into specific strategies for each of these areas, but not right now.

The point for today is that there are lots of ways to spend your money on your wedding. You need to prioritize. You need to figure out which things are important to you. If you've always pictured yourself driving away in a white limo fifty feet long, even if it means having a potluck reception, it's your call. If you plan it so you can walk across the lawn to your reception, and you don't put little mesh bags of personalized M&Ms on the tables, but you saved enough to put an extra couple of cases of booze behind the bar - well you go girl, I want to come to your party.

Remember, cheap weddings don't plan themselves. You have to prioritize, you have to plan. You can have the memorable wedding you want, a wedding that reflects your own personal style, for a lot less money than the "average" wedding. You just have to plan - people who don't plan end up with cheap weddings (or not-so cheap weddings) that look, well, just plain cheap.

You can find lots of good, free planning resources online, including this one. You can save yourself a lot of time by spending a little money on a planning guide like the one I recommended earlier - Erica's book & software. Whichever way you go, remember that it's your wedding, and it's up to you to get it right.

Offbeat venues for cheap weddings

2007-08-26T10:59:00.000-07:00

A hangar? A B-24? A jeep limo?

A few years back, when I was still doing cheap weddings, I helped a San Diego couple put together a 1940s theme wedding. The bride's and groom's grandparents had all been married during World War II, and they decided to do the "wartime bride" thing - a mix of nostalgia, honoring their grandparents, and just plain fun.

First we went looking for venues for the wedding and reception - the 40s idea just wasn't gonna fly in a typical hotel banquet room. We found a cool little simple church, actually 40s vintage and never modernized. We got the church pretty cheap - all day Saturday plus 2 hours Friday night for the rehearsal, complete with organist (perfect little old lady who did a mean wedding march) for I think $200. The couple had their own pastor to officiate (I just love that word - makes weddings sound like a contact sport) at the wedding.

Next we went looking for a reception venue. We really got lucky (when you're doing cheap weddings, it helps to get lucky). We found a local wing of the Confederate Air Force, a volunteer group all about restoring and flying WWII aircraft. At the time, their facility was less of a museum and more of a hangar, and they were hungry enough to accept a fairly small donation, I think it was $1,000, for the use of their hangar for the reception. Some of the members got all worked up about hosting a 40s/WWII theme party, and offered to help. On the day of the reception they rolled the polished-up planes out and put them on display outside the hangar. I think they even had a B-24 at the time. Some of them wore their vintage uniforms and offered the guests tours of the aircraft.

We transformed the hangar with lots of bunting and some vintage recruiting and movie posters, set up rented tables & chairs around a HUGE dance floor, set up a buffet & carving station (we called it a chow line), found a DJ with a great selection of 40s vintage music (perfect to dance to, for all ages), had copies of the grandparents' wedding photos on display - you get the idea.

The groom & wedding party all found their vintage wedding clothes in thrift shops - the bride wore her grandmother's dress. The couple asked guests to wear 40s vintage attire, and people showed up in everything from old uniforms to vintage suits & dresses - even some 40s aloha shirts. The couple were driven away from the church by a uniformed driver in a restored '41 military jeep, trailing a string of tin cans - courtesy of one of the Confederate Air Force guys. It was a great wedding, a fabulous reception, one that everybody will remember - everybody had huge fun. And it cost considerably less than they could have spent at a generic reception hall with in-house catering. As cheap weddings go, it was one of the best.

A vintage or theme wedding isn't for everybody. It worked for this couple, their family, their friends. The point is, even cheap weddings can be memorable and special. Again, it comes down to you deciding what is right for you , and then taking the time to plan everything thoroughly. Planning weddings - especially cheap weddings - takes a lot of time. The couple in this example started planning over a year before their wedding, and saved themselves thousands of dollars. Get started early, and use all the free and cheap wedding planning resources you can find. Good luck - now get going.

PS - If you have any offbeat venue ideas or experiences you'd like to share, hit the comment button. Thanks!

Live music for cheap weddings?

2007-08-29T19:16:00.000-07:00

Honestly, I'm not a big fan of live music at weddings - big expensive affairs or cheap weddings, it makes no difference.
Even if money is no object (liar) I think a good wedding DJ is a better choice. I love dancing to live music - who doesn't? - but I think there are some good reasons not to hire bands for weddings.

Variety - No matter how good they are, no band can cover every song or every style. If you have a "first dance" or special song in mind, chances are you want to hear the real thing. And unless all your guests like the same music, it's good to mix up styles.
Volume - Unless your reception is in an unusually large space (an airplane hangar?), most bands are just too loud. Your reception should be a party, a social event - not a concert.
Flow - Unless the band's front man is also a good wedding emcee (one in a million), you'll end up with dead spots and awkward moments - not good.

Experienced wedding DJs are worth their weight in gold - maybe not what we want to hear when we're talking cheap weddings, but true. A good wedding DJ will act as your emcee, making introductions and announcements, running your reception. Take your time finding the right one, and make sure they know what you want in music and how you want the event to flow. For weddings, I think a DJ's personality is way more important than technical ability or equipment. Smooth DJs can help turn cheap weddings into memorable events.

So where are all these affordable perfect DJs who emcee all these stylish cheap weddings? You can search online, but you'll probably do better looking around locally for recommendations - especially if you're looking for somebody cheap. Weddings that you or your friends go to, local clubs, craigslist - maybe run a "wanted" ad yourself - all are good places to look. You want to find somebody you can talk to in person, to make sure the chemistry is right. It's going to take some time, so don't wait too long to get started.

Cheap weddings take time and a lot of planning if they're not going to look like "cheap" weddings. And speaking of planning, I told Erica I'd do my best to promote her excellent planning guide . Take a look at how she saved a pile of money planning her own wedding, and how you can too. You'll be glad you did.

PS - If money is really no object, you can have both. Bring a good dance band in to do a set or two, and have your emcee to keep the flow going and spin a few discs in between. But if you can afford to do that, what are you doing looking for advice about cheap weddings?

PPS - A shout out to Carrie, who posted the comment asking about live music at her wedding. Anybody else have something you want to hear about?

Does God prefer cheap weddings?

2007-08-27T10:24:00.001-07:00

If so, it's news to me... But the Anglican Church apparently thinks cheap weddings are all the thing. This is from Scotsman.com news:

Church's 'cheap weddings' plea
Brides should consider travelling to their wedding in a taxi, wearing a second-hand wedding dress and asking guests to bring a bottle to the reception, according to the Church of England.

I'm not so sure about those specific recommendations, unless you are going for a riff-raff themed wedding, but I do like their recommendation to reject the costly culture surrounding weddings and embrace a more simplistic approach.

I've been to some cheap weddings I thought were simply divine. Now I have it on good authority.

Cheap dresses for cheap weddings

2007-08-18T13:04:00.000-07:00

What's more natural than cheap dresses for cheap weddings? From our trend-spotting friends at the Washington Post:

Excerpts From Trend Spotter & Co.

The wedding industry is routinely (and often rightfully) criticized for its love of excess. $40,000 dresses! Honeymoons in Parrot Cay! But several designers are flying in the face of Bridezilla culture and offering well-priced (dare I say cheap?) dresses for your big day.

Questions to ask yourself (be honest):

What am I willing to spend for a dress I'll never wear again?
How big is my closet?
Last wedding I went to - do I remember the dress or the food?
Is the whole Cinderella thing really a good look for me?

You get the picture. Don't let your mom or your sis or your best friend or (especially) the bridal magazines tell you how you should dress for your wedding, or how much you should spend. It's your wedding, you get to choose.

Is it going to be easy to choose? Of course not - I never said that cheap weddings are easy to get right.

Cheap weddings - trendy?

2007-08-21T11:31:00.001-07:00

According to the Kansas City Star, a couple of "cheap weddings" strategies are among the latest wedding trends:

Latest wedding trends include cheap gowns, iPods as DJs

Cheap wedding gowns

A once-in-a-lifetime experience no longer requires a once-in-a-lifetime investment.

So here comes the bride — in a budget wedding gown from Target. The gowns that were introduced in May are sold through Target.com for less than $200. Bridesmaid dresses sell for as little as $30.

J. Crew offers wedding gowns for $295 to $2,450.

At H&M, a Viktor & Rolf designer wedding gown for $349 introduced in November sold out in one day.

The typical bride spends more than $1,000 on a wedding gown.

You know I'm all about cheaper wedding dresses - use the money (and your precious closet space) for something more important.

iPods as DJs? Not so much.

Cheap Weddings - good enough for J.Lo...

2007-08-22T15:43:00.001-07:00

OK - one more story to help reassure you that cheap weddings aren't just for the riff raff:

Cheap weddings the new trend for the rich and famous. By Mirvat Sarkis.
Why are the rich and famous opting for cheap no-frills weddings rather than elaborate ones? Well its seems just like fashion changes every season, so do the minds of the super rich and famous. This trend was pioneered by the sophisticated ... (read the rest of the article)

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to see everybody doing "cheap weddings" - what would I do for lunch money?
My point is, lots of people are choosing "cheap" over "extravagant" - you'll be in good company.